Tonight Cyrus tucked me in and told me a story before daddy took him to bed. It went something like this:

"Once there was a shark named Mozy. She lived in the water. On a planet. Called Earth. And there was a camel. The camel also lived on a planet. Called Earth. And this camel just went around kicking people. Because nobody wanted to ride it. And this camel had some cool functions. Nut nobody would ride it. So it got in a rocket and flew up to space. And then came down in the water. And Mozy said, 'what are you doing in the water? You're a camel! You can't swim!' and Mozy decided to be a dolphin. You thought Mozy was a shark, huh? You was thinking about that, huh? But Mozy is a dolphin. And Mozy helped that camel swim. The end."

And then he kissed my nose, turned out the light and shut the door.

Today Cyrus asked me, "Why do we stand up, mom?" 

I told him, "Well, we stand up because that's the easiest place to be when we need to walk."

And he said, "No, but WHY do we stand up?" And he looked down at his little body, puzzled. 

"Ohh." I said, "Well, we stand up because we have bones inside our bodies. If we didn't have bones we'd be gooshy like an octopus. We wouldn't be able to stand up without bones."

He considers this and finally says, "Oh. And so you have girl bones, and I have kid bones." 

 

A few minutes later he asked me "But, why can we move?" 

I told him, "Because we have muscles that move our bones."

And he said, "Oh. Well where are the muscles?"

I told him, "Under your skin." 

And he said, "I want to see them! I want to see my muscles!" He was plucking at his arm skin, trying to look underneath it. 

"Baby, I'm afraid that would hurt." 

"Oh. Because I have blood?"

"Yeah, because you have blood." 

 

Later, he informed me, quite seriously, that he wanted to have a beard like daddy. I asked him why. He told me, in an extremely irritated tone, "Mom, I just need one. I just need a beard, that's all. " Followed by an exasperated, "Gosh." and a dramatic roll of the eyes. Three. He's three. Lord help me when this child turns fifteen. 

I've got a three year old. He likes to make up words. Here is a sampling of The Dictionary According to Cyrus:

 

appy

pronunciation: \ap-pee\

Function: noun

1: the fleshy usually rounded red, yellow, or green edible pome fruit of a usually cultivated tree (genus Malus) of the rose family ; also : an appy tree

 

banana

pronunciation: \ba-naw-naw\ (ba as in bat)

Function: noun

1: an elongated usually tapering tropical fruit with soft pulpy flesh enclosed in a soft usually yellow rind; esecially fun to smash between fingers and smear on the sofa.

 

diggely heart

pronunciation: \digg-ell-ee hart\ 

Function: noun

1: it's like a firetruck. It goes fast, and spins around. And it's RED. "I have a diggely heart."

 

fooey

pronunciation: \foo-ee\ 

Function: noun

1: nickname for big brother, Forest.

gollo

pronunciation: \go-lo\ 

Function: noun

1: "No gollo's allowed."

 

poopt

pronunciation: \poopt\ 

Function: verb

1: "I go poopt! Somebody wipe my butt!"

pitotos

pronunciation: \pee-to-toz\ 

Function: pl. noun

1: an erect South American herb (Solanum tuberosum) of the nightshade family widely cultivated for its edible starchy tuber. Usually served at breakfast around here. NOT to be served with salad. "Or brains!"

scromp

pronunciation: \skromp\ 

Function: verb

1: To press garlic in a garlic press. "Let me scromp it!"

 

shing

pronunciation: \sheeng\ 

Function: verb

1: To maim with a sword, equally acceptable for pirates or ninjas. "Fooey! Watch out! I'm gonna shing you!"

snissors

pronunciation: \sniz-zerz\ 

Function: noun

1: a cutting instrument having two blades whose cutting edges slide past each other. "May I snip this ($100 bill) with my snissors?" (it's already in ten pieces.)

 

squollo

pronunciation: \skwo-lo\ 

Function: noun

1: any of various small or medium-sized rodents (family Sciuridae, the squollo family): as a: any of numerous New or Old World arboreal forms having a long bushy tail and strong hind legs. "Mom! Call me Sandy Squollo! Say, Hi Sandy."

 

wollode

pronunciation: \wol-lod\ 

Function: noun

1: "Aliens are going to take over the wollode!"

 

yesternight

pronunciation: \yester-nite\ 

Function: adverb

1: Very similar to "last night" with the exception that it could be any night in the past. Including one or two years ago. "I sleeped good yesternight"

 

yestertime

pronunciation: \yester-tym\ 

Function: adverb

zoop

pronunciation: \zoop\ 

Function: verb

1: To run a fingernail from heel to toe on the sole of the foot, in an effort to cause sleepiness. "Mom, I tired. Please zoop my toes."